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September, 2005 Updates
The BBX-change commences this month. Due to my mind-rattling schedule and laziness, I have BBXer's invade and take over my site.
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Thursday, September 1st, 2005
As I write this, I feel like there are a thousand needles poking at the inside of my nose. My allergies are here in full force, but hopefully the overpriced Claritan I got at the store will be of use. As you all may know, I will be teaching for the first time tomorrow. But, before we get into that, I am sure you are all dying to know how I spent my birthday.
It was actually a really good birthday with a lot of frustrating crap going on.
The day started joyously enough with a happy birthday wish from Antoine Walker, Mike Bibby, and Jason Richardson. I felt like the cock of the walk until i learned that it was actually a pre-recorded message that they send to everyone who has a birthday. Bright and early, I headed to campus. My schedule told me that I had a Spanish introduction thing to go to but i skipped it so that I could catch the last few minutes of the Counseling Psychology Orientation. All that is , is rounding up the new students and having them introduce themselves. The 2nd year masters students then share stories on what it is like to go through the first year and blah blah blah. Well, when I show up, the panel discussion is going on and everyone looks atme. "Hey, maybe Fernando has something to say," someone says. "Uh, what's the question?" "Any advice for getting through the first year." I smile and and just say, "don't worry about anything." Everyone starts laughing. "no, seriously, the work will get done somehow, don't take anything too seriously." I think if nothing else, it helped ease everyone. Boy they all seemed so scared. I don't think i ever felt that way a year ago. I was too busy living with Moron to worry about anything else.
Then we headed up and had some pizza! Yeah boy! I got to sit with Misty and Betsy and we talked with a pair of newstudents about all the cool projects I've done and how I spiced them up. Like, playing the A-team theme for our Group Presentation. And playing Kermit D. Frog. ANd then i gave them my "kermit the frog" impersonation. Man, I rock.
1:30 was quickly approaching, and I definitely couldn't miss the next portion of the Spanish Orientation, as much as I wanted to. LUckily, I saw Dr. Nelson mingling with everyone and floating ever so much closer to our table. I really didn't feel like being around her. I still feel some resentment towards the way she treated me, so I thought it was best to take that as a sign and go off.
"I have to go, " I said to misty. "Why?" "I have to go," I said. And just grabbed my book bag and nonchallantly headed toward the exit. "Is anyone sitting here?" Nelson's voice asked in the background. "Nando just left," Misty said. "and there he goes." I didn't turn back. I just kept on going as I heard Nelson's "oh" fade into the rest of the noise in the room.
I had the most boring two hours sitting in a room listening to everything I had to do. I think that's somethign that frustrates me a lot. I feel like there's absolutely no room to make any mistakes here. It's so unlike the feeling I got when I first started counseling. There, I felt that the whole reason i was practicing was so that I could mess up and be told how to approac a similar situation in the future. Here, it's just, this is what we expect of you but we're not going to tell you what to do. You just have to wing it and hope that somehow you're doing your job right." And it's such a disorganized department. Case in point: our coordinator thought that her portion of our time went until 3:00 and as a result we were 45 minutes late to the other workshop on how to write an exam.
By that point, I felt like I could collapse. I started talking with some of the Spanish Masters students as they were interested in what counseling was like. "I could never do that," one of them said. "I would always feel like i had to fix my patients' problems and that's all i would think about." I told her that in therapy, you don't really fix anything. You have to give people the tools within themselves to fix their own problems or else they'll grow to depend on you for everything.
And then I started spreading my philosophy. "Above all else, you have to remember one thing," I said. "No matter what anyone expects out of you, no matter what people want or demand, you have to take care of yourself first."
And the look they gave me was priceless. Almost as if to ask, "can...can we do that?" I went on, "because if you don't, you're going to get sick and not going to be of any use to anyone." you just wait. Within 3 months, the whole Spanish Department will be full of slackers thanks to me. ALthough, personally I don't really think it's slacking. Just, being calm.
And then I thought that I should probably take my own advice. It's late. I'm tired. It's my birthday. I got up and just left with 15 minutes left on the clock.
I took the bus home and Betsy called me wanting to know if I still wanted her to come along with me to pick up Melanie from the Madison airport, like i had told her during lunch. We worked out the time and she told me that I should probably get going pretty soon if we wanted to surprise Melanie with signs that had Melanie's name written on them. Before I left though, Becker sent me an awesome Alvin and the Chipmunks e-greeting, which brightened my drive to Campus. I picked Betsy up and she gave me great direction to get to the airport. Boy that is one small airport. Once Melanie arrived, we helped her carry her baggage and I paid 50 cents for the half hour I spent in the parking garage. Then, we were off to get DUCK!
Since it was my Birthday, Melanie treated me to a nice duck dinner, which was rather pricey, but i wasn't going to say no. I mean... it's duck. Never having tried it before, I must say that it was pretty good. Maybe not for the price, but still, it was good. After dropping off the two lovely ladies in their respective apartments, I talked with Erinn for a little bit - something I havent done since at least Christmas. Anyway, afterwards I took my postpned Birthday Walk. Usually, I like to take it just as the clock strikes midnight early on the 31st. BUt because of all of my commitments, I didn't want to be out too late or I would be too sleepy the next day. SO, instead I took it last night right before midnight. It was one of the longer walks I had taken. I ended up in the Downtown area of Middleton... which is actually pretty nice. I sat on the steps of the Middleton City Hall, which was pretty neat.
Whoo. and that's that.
Today, I've been trying not to cut off my nose, like I feel I so desperately should do. Other than that, I've been trying not to stress out too much over the first day of class. The one i teach, that is. Wish me luck. I'll fill you in on how it went. |
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Saturday, September 3rd, 2005
Profe
Well, isn't anyone going to ask about how my first day of teaching went? In case you were wondering, it went rather well. We spent about 8 minutes with introductions. In my most serious, no-nonsense approach, I just made them learn how to say "Good morning, my name is...." and "what's your name?" I figured that was enough for one day starting from scratch. Then we went over the syllabus. And I found something out about myself that I didn't know before. I've actually made huge strides in overcoming my shyness. Before, a situtation like that would have devestated me. I would have rushed to finish the syllabus so that I didn't have to be up there. Maybe it was the fact that I was the one who had to show leadership or control, but I discovered that I'm actually really longwinded. I barely had time to cover about 3/4ths of everything I wanted to say before the bell rang. In my haste, I even forgot to assign the homework, so i had to submit it through email. My fear still is that because I tend to like talking so much, that I may switch to english constantly. That wouldn't be cool.
I have my tuesday lesson plan all rarin to go... it's a pretty weird amalgamation of suggested activities and my own take on what would be most helpful. I'm gonna grill em! I actually enjoyed teaching. Seeing all their eyes - and the troublemakers' grins (yes, I've already spotted them)-- wide towards me. That's quite the rush. I would probably want to teach College level courses. YOu don't have to worry about parents too much and students still somewhat care about their gades.
I should get going as my allergies are out of control.
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Tuesday, September 6th, 2005
Two whole days!
That's how long I have survived as a Spanish 101 instructor. I deserve the proverbial pat on the back. More on that later. First I must fill you all in on what transpired during this last weekend. Nothing.
Well, my weekend would have been uneventful, if not for the fact that I got to hang out with Kuldhir, my old supervisor from Spring semester. He was in town from Carbondale, IL where he is doing his internship. It was a trip, as always. That man has the wildest notions, and I feel honored that he feels that I am worthy to be informed of the way he thinks. Although, whenever we get to talking about me, I tend to shy away and feel like a tool for wanting a Doctorate Degree in, of all things, counseling psychology- unlike Kuldhir, who's just in the program to be in Madison and to get a manageable timetable for his life. On the whole, though, I think he and I do have great notions. We started talking about literature and then he mentioned this book by Italo Calvino, which I should probably pick up because it is told by one man who just talks about what he sees. The power of observation- few people know how to engage in it anymore. Are you sure you're seeing what you think you are? It's so amazing to just stare at something - note: do not stare at someone's boobs, that doesn't count- and to think about it. Some would argue it is great to describe it, but I am not much for description. If I look at the sun light hitting a plant, my thoughts are more on how living things need light to survive and how someone in the dark would never truly live, not what shade of green the plant turns.
Anyway, as I said, nothing more happened this weekend, but I did get some much needed rest. I got to teach again today, which was really cool. I had to think on my feet again, because I had forgotten most of my lesson plan at home, but it went really well. My students can now say their names and introduce themselves and ask other people where they are from and how they are doing and where they hail from. They're growing up before my eyes. I think I like teaching thus far- at least more than I thought I would. When you eliminate all those pesky 'requirements' and just do things at your own speed, while still respecting what students should be learning, the means of getting there are actually quite enjoyable.
I had my first two classes of the semester as well. I want to desperately drop that stupid spanish course they're making me take. Maybe if I really exaggerate the experience I had as a 101 tutor, they'll permit me to do so. It's just way too time-consuming. My prac class on the other hand, is much more laid back and acknowledges the fact that grad students barely have time to eat - like today- much less read a ton of articles.
Before I leave, I want to remind all of you who keep regular tabs on this website that starting tomorrow, we'll be trying out a new experiment that will go on until at least the end of this semester. BBX-embeds from all over the Midwest will be taking over this website to input thier own thoughts and emotions from a wide array of topics. With big names such as the BeX-man, Funky, and Scott of the Bloc clan, as well as newcomer Melanie, this will prove not to dissapoint. Occasionally, I may add a few thoughts to keep you all informed of what has been going on with me, but most likely, I will not have the time. Here now is the weekly schedule one last time:
Mellon Mondays Nady Fertuesdays Humpin' it with BeX Scott's Thirsty Funky Fridays
I hope this proves to be a successful venture. I deserve a much needed break from updating this damned thing so much. Starting...
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| Wednesday, September 7th, 2005
Humpin' it with Becker - Week One
Well, hello everyone out there in interweb land. "The intarnets," as George Bush would put it.
Speaking of GWB, did you see what his mom said yesterday? When visiting hurricane refugees in the Astrodome, Barbara Bush commented, "And so many of the people in the arena here, you know, were underprivileged anyway, so this is working very well for them."
I'll let that speak for itself.
On to the finer arts...
An Exercise in Iambic Pentameter A challenge was posted in a forum I browse to write something in strict Iambic Pentameter, ABABCC rhyming scheme. "It was good enough for Billy Shakeshaft, John Donne and Kit Marlowe so let's give it a go," the poster proclaimed. Normally, I'm not much for poetry, but I think a prescribed form made the task less daunting than simply "write a poem."
Here was my offering, cooked up in about an hour. Kind of simplistic, but I think it turned out decently:
Into my head a glib reply has crept The seeds of discourse planted in my head The thoughts which under lock and key I've kept Will now be laid before you all and read If I should leave this world before too long Emotion sparked by words will be my song
For what awaits beyond the great unknown? A sleep eternal peaceful and serene? Angelic choir benevolent in tone? Or punishment for thoughts and deeds obscene? Perhaps we end in nothing more than dust Thus live on in the words laid here I must
Like nature's tangled roots do spread in earth Affect the lives and hearts of neighbor men To change the world, spread knowledge and cause mirth For that alone is great accomplishment Enjoy the time you've got for what it's worth To stress for petty things is not in zen And leaves upon your life a glaring dearth I claim no sage nor sense nor acumen But cause no pain toward fellow pawns of fate Philosophy devoid of harm and hate
Becker News Well, I had an eventful weekend, at least. Saturday, I went canoeing on the Kankakee River with Anthony (not Tony-Tone) and Erica. We had fun lounging, joking, and wading across the river. After 3.5 hours of paddling and the requisite small-town America visit to Dairy Queen, we headed home. I took with me memories and sunburn, but thankfully, no leeches.
Sunday, the same trio went to a barbecue get-together at Anita's "house" (read: mansion). Ate whores devores around a bonfire and talked with some new peeps and old ones (including former Fernando cohort Jason Porod. They weren't really cohorts, but I like saying that word).
Monday, I spent half the day precariously balanced 25 feet up a ladder, nestled snugly between high-voltage power lines and the edge of the house. What was I up there for, you ask? Why, the tricep-soothing and eardrum-pleasing task of scraping and wire-brushing the gutters and downspouts. And I get to go up again next week to paint. Yay! After I had finished that, my Dad and I went out for our weekly round of golf, which he paid for, so that was good.
I leave you with my Song Download of the Week: Doesn't Remind Me by Audioslave. Excellent song.
Hasta Luego, Tannerinos!
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| Thursday, September 8th, 2005
Scott's Thursday all day! Week One
Hello every one!!! I am not sure if you all know me, I am Scott Block (the big lug to right). Met Nado through Chua back during my 1st year (2nd year for Chua and Nado). So school is just getting started for me, and all I know is I am going to be nuts by the end of this semester. Kid of in a fix with that. The department put me on this weird probation (btw: Mechanical Engineering student, University of Illinois UrbanaChampaign). Basically my grades are fine, but because I have been here too long and taken too many classes not related to Mechanical Engineering (~1 years worth) they have taken over my ability to choose my own classes. Was planning on finishing in a nice 6 years, but now my last 2 years of college are rammed into 1 year and a summer. Yeah, philosophy classes aren't looked too well on by my department. Yeah... they really don't like me too much, because I was able to get grants for my project, but was not taking any engineering courses at the time. Right before school started, I took a 5 day trip to New York to drop my sister off at Cornell. Quite a lovely school, very hilly, and green. The first thing I noticed was how short all the men were. You could tell a person was out of state from their hight. I am not that tall, but I towered over them. Went for a nice hike and took some nice pictures of the forest area around there. Oh I have not said any thing too much about my self. I am from Texas (but not your normal Texan). Just started looking for a job. Already got my first rejection and its only be about a week or two since I started looking. Will write more next week, have to get to moving my friend's stuff. My apartment was turned into a storage room for 4 other people over the summer. So had to move a lot of stuff out of my old place into my new place. I probably made over 50 small trips to bring all the stuff. Any one know a panoramic program for Linux?
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| Friday, September 9th, 2005
Funky Fridays - Week One
9/9/05
Before I begin today?s column proper, I would like to say that I am sufficiently pumped about how this ?Write Nando?s Web Page For Him? scam is going so far. Thus far, we?ve been treated to some quality existential form poetry, a travelogue of Cornell University, a critique of higher education, and making fun of the Bushes (more to come there, I assure you). While Nando credits me for suggesting this format, I in turn have to credit Tom Tomorrow at www.thismodernworld.com, because I stole the idea from him.
Now, on to this week?s edition of Funky Friday we go.
Whenever I get advice about how to write from people who are not so much world-famous writers as they are related to me, it always assures me that the correct method is to simply write about something you know, and right now what I know the most is that I like sports. A lot. This summer, I have come to terms with the fact that I?m not merely a causal follower of sports, or a guy who knows enough to get his way through a conversation about them. Instead, I am a SuperFan. I have attended football games in the snowy middle of November without a shirt on with a giant red A on my chest. At the moment, I can probably name at least 18 of the 22 starters on the Indianapolis Colts, and possibly half of their back-ups.
At this point, some of you are possibly saying, ?Geez, Andy. I don?t really care a whit about sports. And I certainly wasn?t happy about that mental picture of you without a shirt on. And making up dialogue from imagined critics is a very tired literary device.? While these may be good points all, this column is for those very nonexistent readers who decry sports as a big waste of time and a giant waste of newspaper space, because I am going to explain exactly why I like sports, and why sports are an important big waste of time and a giant waste of newspaper space.
Simply put, I like the world of professional sports because it is like the real world, only fake. There are rules in professional sports, just like there are rules in real life. People and teams make choices in professional sports and live with the consequences of them, just like in real life. Professional athletes, teams, and fans exhibit all of the same emotions and attachments that they do in real life. Sports are enough like real life to be fun, but detached enough to be safe and fanciful.
Sports fandom immediately gives a person membership into a community. People generally do not like to watch sporting events by themselves nearly as much as with groups, because in a group, everyone is united in a cause, despite any other differences we might have. Sports provide a very genuine sense of camaraderie between your fellow fans, as well as providing a sense of moral superiority over the fans of the other team. Yankees fans, for example, are known to be rabid defenders of an inequitable system that allows teams with rich owners like the Yankees to outbid all other teams for talent, and then laugh at and denigrate their opponents when they field their illicitly acquired stacked lineup against the hapless, poorer owners. Pistons fans are considered to be psychotic misanthropes who not only exalt, but also emulate the most reprehensible aspects of their solidly reprehensible team.
This leads us to the real joy of sports: they allow us to do things that are completely socially unacceptable but make us feel better in the process. For example, in the real world, most people do not enjoy laughing at other people?s misery, or at least do not do so openly. As a society, we generally like to see uplifting success stories rather than watching our fellow man fall into a downward spiral to oblivion. In the crazy fake world of professional sports, however, everyone likes to laugh at the Clippers when they let all of their star players sign with rival teams for the umpteenth year straight, or at the Atlanta Hawks when they sign high-priced marginally-talented players to fill positions already manned by high-priced marginally-talented players and call it a blockbuster move. We generally like to be slow to accuse and condemn as a society, but when Randy Moss only pretended to moon Packers fans in the NFL playoffs last year, angry people denouncing him as a bad role model depleted the entire nation?s vitriol reserve. I?ve even seen some sportswriters refer to NFL player agent Drew Rosenhaus as Evil Incarnate. In the fake world of sports, the physical manifestation of all that is wrong with the world is a players? AGENT.
The best part about sports, however, is the ability to prove one?s analytical superiority on a regular basis. Professional sport leagues offer a variety of statistics to analyze, positions to compare and contrast, and match-ups to consider. The free access of this information provides a level playing field for prognosticators, meaning if you pick correctly and your friend does not, you are simply a better predictor than your friend and may gloat in an obnoxiously smarmy manner.
So, why is it good that professional sports bring out the worst in us as a society? I believe that as individuals we all need to express antisocial impulses we have, but we repress them because we do not want to be known as the big jerkface who lives next door. Professional sports provide us with a very safe, socially acceptable, and fun way to channel these unpleasant emotions. This allows us to approach the real world with its serious real world problems like responsible adults.
Based on both my observations here in Middle of Nowhere, Indiana and based on a few reads of some lesser known conservative opinion writers, it is my belief that a lot of the rampant jingoism and fourth grade level political discourse is simply due to a lack of interest in sports. ?Security moms? who are not traditionally sports fans act strangely like the most hardcore of SuperFans and display the same array of antisocial, obsessive behaviors. They buy flags and yellow ribbon magnets to plaster all over their vehicles, not completely unlike how I have to resist the temptation to buy a Colts car flag every time I go to work. They believe that we should overlook the abuses and torture performed by soldiers and insist that the alleged acrimonious acts and alliances of the detainees warrant the no-mercy treatment, sort of like how I claimed on a weekly basis last year that Ron Artest was unfairly punished by the league when he was just reacting to mistreatment from the fans instigated by Ben Wallace?s attempts to pick a fight and later rile the crowd during the November 19 brawl. They have an unwavering belief that their views are underrepresented in the media that parallels my belief that league offices subtly favor large market teams over those located in places like Indianapolis. I dislike Pistons fans and save my strongest denunciation for Pistons fans who live in Indiana. They dislike terrorists, a team whose official uniform consists of Arabic descent, but save most of their rancor for fellow Americans who don?t particularly want to see this contest played out. Jonah Goldberg even attempted to place a wager with Juan Cole on the outcome of the war in Iraq. I can only assume that these people listen to news about the war the same way I listen to Pacers Radio broadcasts:
?The 101st has been seeing a lot of action lately at the Fallujah position. They?ve really been producing there, but they?ve been getting hit hard on the inside leading some to wonder whether Coach Rumsfeld is going to??
?BOOM BABY!!!?
?National elections in Baghdad! This is a huge momentum swing for the US! If they can just build on this the Fighting Islamofascists will be hard pressed to stay in the fight for any??
?Oh come on, don?t let ?em start doin? that stuff now??
?The Shias were quick to take control of that situation, and they look determined to set the tempo through the rest of the contest.?
?We need a timeout to regroup, otherwise we?re gonna fall too far behind??
?And it looks like that?s what Bush has in mind. Yes, he?s calling for an extended time-out??
?Wait, the Islamofascists aren?t leaving the field for the time-out! They?re playing through? oh no, they just dropped 14 on??
?We need to take a break for our sponsors. You?re listening to the US Army Radio Network.?
Commercial: ?Hispanic Muslim Homosexuals are trying to take your jobs! Only President Bush can keep you safe! Vote for Bush? or else!?
As far as I can tell, these people either do not follow sports and are left searching for an activity that will fill them with a sense of belonging and allow them to express their inner-jackass, or they are just plain not bright enough to understand that while it is perfectly fine for me to make childish insults toward sports figures because nobody dies based on how many games the Indiana Pacers win over the course of a season, it is a major problem if childish insults are the principal medium for debate on war. Hopefully these people will find something, sports-related or not, that will fill this void in their lives that is currently occupied by X-Treme Patriotic Republicanism.
I will leave you all with this bit of good news out of New Orleans from CNN (4th from the bottom):
There was a Saint in New Orleans during the wrath of Hurricane Katrina and his name is Joe Horn, pro-football player for the New Orleans Saints. As I sat in my room at the Hilton Riverside, New Orleans, on Saturday two days before Katrina was scheduled to directly hit New Orleans, I weeped while I phoned home to North Carolina, to speak with my mother and my children. It had been confirmed that my flight was canceled along with that of my husband and 50 others. We all were frantically trying to evacuate. I sobbed as I was told by each rental car company that there were no cars available. I thought I was trapped. But, unbeknownst to me my mother had placed a call to Joe Horn to see if he could help. I hadn't spoken to him in over 20 years. Joe was a friend of my sister's in high school and had always kept in touch with my mother. This wonderful man personally came to pick up my husband and I and arranged for his driver to drive us from New Orleans to Atlanta, Georgia, at his expense, at which point we could fly on to Fayetteville, North Carolina. I'm still amazed at his generosity and I will always be grateful to him. There is truly a saint in New Orleans!! Thank you, Joe Horn. You're my hero!! Aleta Quinones Fayetteville, North Carolina
So, I?d like to publicly salute Mr. Joe Horn, who now has a much better track record for rescuing people than anyone in the Bush Administration.
See you all next week.
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| Saturday, September 10th, 2005
I'll do my best to stay on topic, as I'm really really tired.
Isn't it great having people write your website for you? I've been sitting back just watching the sparks fly. Now, I thought I would fill you all in on my week since I had a moment where I could hide, far , far away from the demands of Everyone throughout Madison. For all intents and purposes, this was my first real week of the semester, in that it provided me the taste - the bitter taste - of what is in store for me at least until December. And when I think that I didn't have class on Monday, i start to feel anxious. I went for Orientation on Wednesday at Family Service, where I will be doing my prac. I think that if I ever hire any interns in whatever I do later on in life, I will make it my goal to banish every single orientation program -related activities. They just always overwhelm me. "This is what you have to do these next 9 months" presented in 3 hours. Bah.
Regardless, I did have the opporunity to realize just how small a world is. One of the girls (and yes, all three of the other interns are girls. God, I'm sick of not having male peers- even the TA's are mostly chicks) is actually married to one of the Spanish TA's. It was kinda funny how memory works. We were sitting at the table, just kinda introducing ourselves. She said her name was Lisa (not to be confused with Loose Lisa) and that she was working to get her MFT (Marriage and Family Therapy) and that she should actually introduce herself with a different last name - Lisa Wolf- she always forgets to do that - because she just recently got married. Up to this point, None of this sounds very familiar. That is until she mentions that her husband is starting his second year at law school. Something clicks in my mind and I remember one of the TA's, Saul Wolf, who is starting his second year of Law School. At one point during the Spanish orientation he said that his wife was studying to be a marriage and family therapist. After the other two introduce themselves, I ask Lisa "What did you say your husband's name was?" WHen she says Saul Wolf, I smile and tell her that he and I teach spanish at the same time - 11:00 am.
That was really the only cool part of the day. The rest was spent listening to how much we are "expected" to do, which really got me into a rather depressing Mood. I dunno. It's just insane for anyone to expect me to do so much this semester. And when you take into account that the bus from campus to Family Service only runs every hour, I really have less time than originally thought. It's been weird. The thing I thought I was going to enjoy the most is now something I dread. And the thing I chose to do simply for the sake of finances has been catapulted all the way up to the No. 1 slot in my "things that matter" list. Which isn't very long to begin with.
I really love teaching Spanish. At least this week anyway. I think what I enjoy most about it is that most have already had some background in the language, or some other foreign tongue, so (re)learning this doesn't seem as scary or as confusing when compared to those who have never studied a darn word. We have a quiz coming up on Tuesday and they're all scared, which is rather adorable. I know that I can't really know how well or badly a job I'm doing until I get supervised sometime before October ends, but this upcoming quiz will be a good litmus test to see if I'm taking them in the right direction. It's rather interesting to know that some people really like your class and actually look forward to it, and then realizing that there are probably others that dread every moment of it for any number of reasons. I guess I can't please everyone.
One aspect of teaching 101 that I really dislike s that stupid class I have to take as part of the deal. I dislike the professor, who is also my supervisor. She runs her damned class for Masters students the way she would run it for undergrads- which is actually more like the way anyone would run it for high schoolers. She is so controlling and you have to be on time, and she gets really pissy if things aren't going a certain way. Dude, let it go. See, I think I rule in that sense. I don't consider that things have to be a certain way. If someone shows up late, I really don't make a big deal out of it by embarrassing them (usually by commenting 'buenas noches'). And how do I know that she's like this in her other Undergraduate courses? Because that's the way she told us to treat our students.
I started to think about wabash and how everyone was pretty much treated like a man. If you were late, the classy thing to do was to take a seat, and not make a sound and the prof wouldn't call you on it. At least that was my experience. Maybe it's a state college thing. Maybe it's a Wisconsin Thing. Maybe it's a city thing. I don't know. What I do know, though, is that I resent being treated like I'm in tenth grade again whenever I get to class ten minutes late because of the bus schedule. I guess I should talk to her, but frankly, she scares me.
Bus schedules. Lord, I hate the bus. Getting to family Service is impossible because My class gets out at 11:50, leaving me 12 minutes to rush to the bus stop before it passes. I tried to do this on Wednesday, and at that hour, you can't get anywhere without trampling on 50 undergraduates in front of you. It is just so densely packed as far as you can see. I decided that I would never go through that again. I would just wait until 1:02 when the next bus passed, and if it meant not getting enough hours from 1:20 until they closed, I would make them up during the mornings sometime. It was also on Wednesday when Orientation was through at 5:00 and I realized that I was already late for my next class at UW. I jumped on the bus that passes at nine after the hour and then got off down the road when the driver informed me that I could make it t campus a lot faster if I got out right then and crossed the busy street to catch the 27 coming straight for us. By the time I got to my class, it was half after the hour, and I was ready to pass out. It was at that point that I realized that I couldn't do it.
Im thinking of dropping my Wednesday class, but we'll see how that goes. I need to talk to the prof and let him know that I'd be coming in to class late every day. I hate this crap.
Thursday was cool only because my spanish class went over the numbers and "me gusta", so we had some fun with that. I had them do math problems on the board. And then when we talked about our likes, I informed them that I loved "peliculas de accion, especialmente las del cero, cero siete." A look of slow recognition formed on thier faces. "oh...Oh!" And then when I said, "A mi, me encanta la leche. Me tomo dos galones de leche cada semana," Again, that same look appeared, "what?! Really?"
Of course, I also put them on the spot. We had two new students join our class on Friday, so I made them all introduce themselves. I wrote down "name, tengo___ anos, hometown, and what you like to do" on the board, and they were all able to do a pretty good job with introductions. Of course, a lot of it was just hearing it so often, that when it was your turn to go, you just plugged in your own data, but still, they understood where stuff was supposed to go in their speech, which is more than they knew a week ago.
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| Monday, September 12th, 2005
Mellon-Mondays
Melanie phones it in
Since Melanie is going through some rough times right now, i thought it would be best to give her some time to relax and enjoy to herself. Instead of posting nothing, she was kind enough to let me post the issues she made of The Consultant, back when we were both suffering in that class. So, sit back and relax, while these things load (long waiting time). Hopefully Melanie will be back the third week.
Issue One Page 1
Issue Two Page 2
In Nando news, real quick, i had my first student say he really enjoyed my class. WooT!
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| Tuesday, September 13th, 2005
Nady Fertuesdays
News Updates: that kid that said he liked my class had to drop the class, which left me feeling really bummed. Now I'm having a hard time getting enthusiastic about the course again. Especially after today's class, which was really horrible. Well, maybe 'horrible' is stretching it. But I really felt it wasn't that great. Maybe tomrrow will be better.
Hasta luego.
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| Wednesday, September 14th, 2005
I apologize for the length of this entry, for I had no time to be brief.
Since I last spoke to you all, I am a year older. Well, technically only seven days older, but I am now 23. And I have accomplished...shit. I better get things in gear now that I'm on a downward slide from the prime of my life. Ah well, que sera sera.
Paul took me out for my birthday. We went bar hopping in Forest Park, and I beat him at darts even though I was quite tipsy. Met up with Anthony later, and somehow we ended up, as all drunken nights do, at some dingy Mexican restaurant. Good times.
I got Cowboy Bebop t-shirt from Anth (my favorite anime), various DVDs (Simpsons season 6, Deer Hunter, Dawn of the Dead/Shaun of the Dead combo pack), a new golf club, a suitcase, and some cold, hard cash.
Played tennis with my dad on Sunday. I think I won, as he had to quit due to a condition known in the medical world as Old Man Syndrome.
Yesterday, for some reason, I was looking at my "blocked" list on AIM, and realized that I had blocked one of my former best friends, a guy I used to hang out with like every day in high school, but have since fallen out of touch with. I must have blocked him temporarily for some reason and forgot about it for the past year. Crap. :(
Well, I wish I had more to write, but I just got home from work and I'm quite tired.
Song Download of the Week: The Killers - All These Things That I Have Done I am addicted to this song.
~Becker
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| Thursday, September 15th, 2005
Scott's Thirsty
Scott2.pdf
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| Sunday, September 18th, 2005
That slacker Funk is late with his column, but he promises a good one, so we'll just be a little patient. As for me, I had a rough week , particularly with teaching. It's still the same, just that I miss my best student in the class, and there's really no one there that seems to like learning Spanish as much as he did. I go to my prac site every wed, thurs and fri. But I managed to get my wed calss switched to an independent reading, so now I don't have to worry about missing half an hour every time. Today was a slow day but yesterday I made huge strides in finishing up my apps. All I really need now at this point are some paltry essays.
Nando.
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| Monday, September 19th, 2005
Funky Friday - Monday Edition
Many apologies for the delay. I've been unconscious and working, sometimes simultaneously.
Rather than attack some random issue that only I care about, this week I plan on giving you a nice detailed report on how I spent this past Funky Friday. It was most memorable.
A month ago I decided that I was going to audition for American Idol when it came to Chicago. My plan was to win using a foolproof formula. First, the American Idol people want to find people who would be interesting to watch on television. To address this, I would wear my bright green polyester leisure suit. Second, the American Idol people are looking for a fit on demographics above all else. To address this, I planned on being white and male. This, I might add, worked better than expected. Third and of least importance, the American Idol people wanted someone who can sing. I believe I can say without any undue modesty that I am pretty damn good at this. In fact, of people my age that I've met, I can only think of two people who are inarguably better singers than me. The first is Caleb Ishman, who had an amazing tenor voice and sang in the Glee Club at Wabash. The second is our good friend the Borminator, due in no small part to his insanely huge, jealousy-inducing range. To finish the plan of attack, I'd sell a personality: American Idol has been in desperate need of vaguely counter-culture goofy white guys, and to illustrate how I'd fit this demographic, my plan was to sing "Just Dropped In (To See What Condition My Condition Was In)" by Kenny Rogers and the First Edition, repopularized by its use in the hallucinated Gutterballs scene in "The Big Lebowski".
As luck would have it, a manager from the Burger King that adjoins my beloved 1 & 70 Shell was also auditioning, so we made plans to carpool. While she had a strong voice, I felt she would be lacking in the first two areas, as she not only wasn't male but also failed at possessing an outlandish green suit. She was also singing something from a musical as opposed to something from The Big Lebowski.
At 11 pm, we left for the Windy City. We had no idea what we were in for. How does one write that sentence so that it does not end with a preposition? I seriously do not know. I won't detail the trip too closely other than say that Tamara, my partner in this venture, was attempting to find a second song to sing should she be sent to the second stage of the selection system, and this search involved way too much Celine Dion for my taste. Anyway, we arrive in Chicago around 3:30 am. The parking garage was filled with people camping out and singing and generally having a good time with song and fellowship. Verily, as I looked on to the scene, the first verse of Neil Diamond's "America" was in my head. Far, we'd been traveling far, without a home, but not without a star. Free, only want to be free, we huddled close, hang on to our dreams. I briefly considered changing songs, but then realized that nobody outside of me thinks that Neil Diamond is cool.
Around 4:45, we got in line, which wasn't supposed to form until 6 but was forming anyways whether they liked it or not. People stared at my suit. Around 5:15 it started pouring down rain, and we all got really really wet. And cold. It was about thirty minutes later that Tamara remembered she had two blankets in her car, and since it appeared that we would be out there until they started letting people in around 8:30, I thought it would be prudent if I went and got them. This turned out to be a big mistake. Black paint had spilled in the trunk of her car, where the blankets were kept. I rubbed a lot of it onto the parking garage floor, but apparently not enough of it. Worse, when it got wet, it began to drip off. Within minutes, I was fighting with a wet, heavy blanket dripping black paint all over everything. This was unacceptable considering I could not afford to have my garish suit tarnished.
They decided to let us in around 5:50, and I realized I couldn't find my ticket to get in. Tamara moved with the line as I was left fighting a dripping black blanket, my collapsable chair I brought to sit in while I waited, and my backpack while attempting to move with the crowd while searching valiantly for my ticket. The fact that I managed to find my ticket while keeping most of the black paint off of me still amazes me. I had my ticket, my identification, and my bag ready to be searched as I got to the security gates. They waved me through without searching through anything. I was unimpressed with security. This was the beginning of me being unimpressed with things. Really, had a terrorist wanted to blow up either American Idol or the Chicago Bears, it wouldn't have been difficult, and many would argue that neither would be a major loss.
I promptly dropped the blanket beside a dumpster, as I had no more desire to carry the thing around, and decided to find Tamara. I'll say now, at the risk of sounding extremely insensitive, that the situation couldn't help but remind me of a sort of Hurricane Katrina Lite experience. We had just suffered a very long, cold downpour and were herded into Soldier Field with no clear plan as far as what to do with us. We were not allowed to find our seats, and so everyone was crashing wherever they could find a spot on the Mezzanine. There was also a dash of Woodstock '99 thrown in, as vendors walked around selling hot cocoa for $3 per 16 oz cup. I eventually found Tamara after about 30 minutes of searching. She had huddled up with her blanket and neglected a rather large and drippy spot of black paint that took the opportunity to reapply itself to her shirt. The result was not extremely appealing. She was also not dressed for the whether to begin with, as the shirt was rather thin, and her miniskirt was not providing much warmth at all. I was only slightly better off, despite my very heavy polyester suit. Did you know that when polyester gets wet, it never, ever dries? Even after hours and hours? I didn't. As a result, I was soaked to the bone and freezing for the entire day. Plus, the suit was getting heavier by the second. It was quite exhausting to simply move around. I attempted to brush my hair and would have to take breaks to catch my breath.
Soldier Field, as it turns out, is also not a good place to put freezing downpour survivors. The architects who designed it decided it would be fun to build a stadium that somehow was able to trap every gust of wind in Chicago and swirl them around at high speeds within the stadium. I'd say this took a particular stroke of genius, but in reality it just took the insipid mistake of forgetting to add a roof to the building. This is a slight tangent, but honestly, who really thinks that building stadiums without roofs is a good idea? Homo Erectus had the brains to seek shelter that provided a roof over his head; why can't professional football venue architects follow his example? The result of forgetting this roof is that people end up cold and unhappy with unpleasant winds blowing over them all day long instead of comfortable and happy in a controlled climate that can only be made possible by adding a frickin' roof. In addition, in the perfect conditions allowed by a roof, it's possible to do things like establish a faster paced game with an emphasis on exciting pass plays, while cold weather snow games mainly involve watching the quarterback hand the ball off to the running back who gets two yards before being tackled and injured due to the extra strain cold weather puts on the body. Sure, if it's a nice day, an outdoor game could be pleasant, if one considers 4 hours in the sun a good time rather than the cancer-risk it actually is. Fans in Green Bay, Denver, Chicago, Cleveland, Pittsburgh, Buffalo, and especially in Foxboro should realize that open air stadiums are not really as cool as people pretend they are. I imagine this has nothing whatsoever to do with the fact that my favorite football team's star player's name is now synonymous with "can't win in the cold."
Back to the story: the rest of the morning is kind of a blur, because my body was tired from maintaining homeostasis over impossible odds and generally being awake for long amounts of time. Eventually we were herded out of the Mezzanine into the stands, where we got to face even more winds. We sat there from 8:30 to 10 before anything happened, and what did happen was not good. The audition process got started an hour late, and they never seemed to have all of the judges they promised they would to get the audition process going smoothly. This, combined with the fact that we were in the next to last section to get a chance to audition, made us realize that they were not going to come remotely close to getting around to us. This was after sitting for three more hours and watching them audition three sections of hopeful idols that we could neither see nor hear. In fact, the main entertainment was the laying of the astroturf by the Soldier Field staff. At one point I thought I saw Kyle Orton, but then realized that I don't know what Kyle Orton looks like, so I ruled that possiblity out. There were approximately 20 sections between where they were and our section after these three hours, so the chances of us getting an audition were extremely slim.
To say we were disgruntled at this point would be an understatement. In truth, I was so far from gruntled that I couldn't even remember what gruntled felt like. My scantily clad female companion felt much the same, and we decided to get our freezing, miserable selves out of Dodge. I felt robbed, in all honesty. I was a shoo-in for the show. My plan was working to the max: nobody there wore anything that would make them stand out, and the majority of the auditioners were either female or a minority. White males simply did not audition in large numbers, and the ones that did looked like typical frat guys rather than interesting quirky types like myself. However, I was so cold and miserable that my survival instinct overcame my desire for fame, and I was rather happy to get away from it.
But just as we hit rock bottom, my suit's sheer magnetism paid off. On the way out, a female reporter approached me and asked if we would be a part of her segment. She claimed to be from "A Current Affair." Upon hearing this, I thought, "Wasn't that show cancelled years ago?" which was promptly followed with "This is a scam." But I agreed, because what did I have to lose? She wanted to know who we were, where we were from, and how our audition experience went. She also claimed that her show was considering some form of talent contest of their own and were looking for people. I was dubious of this, but I went on anyway. I sang for them, answered their questions, and generally smiled and was my friendly self. Tamara got a shot too, although I think it was mainly because she was associated with my wallflower self at the time. After our interviews and songs, they got some "action shots" of us walking. They also wanted us to look like we were having a discussion. This was easy, as I talked to Tamara about how freakin' cold it was and how we'd rather be in the car getting warm than walking around in circles for A Current Affair. They laughed at that. They then said they'd let us know what they were going to do with the footage they got of us. To be honest, I think they were lying to us and that their story was really "Stupid Looking American Idol Rejects." My soaked green polyester suit and Tamara's black paint covered shirt were easy targets.
The ride home was uneventful, other than the fact that we stopped at a Burger King where a group of Hispanic women sexually harrassed me in Spanish. I pretended like I didn't understand. Also, I attempted to order the chicken fries with the buffalo sauce, but was shouted down by my server, who gave me two packets of BBQ instead. Tamara also insisted that the manager was checking her out the whole time, but she's inclined to believe that everyone is checking her out when that is probably not the case. Regardless, it was a strange place. I drove the majority of the trip while barely conscious, but since Tamara was completely unconscious, I figured this was the safest alternative.
In the end, it appears that rockstardom has eluded me once again, unless this A Current Affair thing pans out for me. But, fame may be mine in another way, as I took a thirty minute nap while we sat in the Mezzanine and apparently someone took a picture of me sleeping with my mouth open and drooling. I'm sure that'll end up on the internets eventually. The lesson to be learned here is that American Idol sucks, big time. They were extremely incompetent at everything they attempted to do, and I'm angry and bitter about the whole thing. I feel vindicated in the fact that I have never seen an episode of the show, because I'm even more sure it can't be good now.
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| Nady FerWednesdays
tired, as usual
I played a simpsons episode in class today so that they could practice commenting on family members, age and adjectives. This begs the question, "When is the 'Baywatch' Chapter?"
Yo siempre estoy listo, nunca te dejare fuera de mi vista!
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| Wednesday, September 21, 2005
Humpin it with Becker- Third edition
Hello out there and welcome again to another edition of Becker Weekly.
How is everyone feeling today? If you're down, don't go downtown, don't find a bridge over troubled water, just do this: Look yourself in the mirror and say, "I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and gosh darnit, people like me."
Or, if you don't think you're good enough, do what I did. Fix yourself. Before & After. Save them to your comp and use the Windows Picture Viewer thingy to flip back and forth between them.
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In world news, The Katrina death toll has surpassed that of the Iraqi bomb-scare bridge strategy.
So we can all stop talking about that stampede and start talking about Katrina now, right?
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Well, to recap my week, on Saturday I drove down to Champaign-Urbana with Paul. Some friends from U of I were holding their annual "Spudfest," which is a party held in honor of their quiet, reserved friend named "Spudley." Man, was it huge. They rented a Coors Lite trailer, the kind with taps on the side. And what was supplying those taps, you ask? 16 kegs. Despite the party being broken up at 12:30 by the cops, and $500 in fines, they still made a net profit of some $800. Of course, it was about the comraderie, not the money.
The next morning we watched the Bears crush the Lions (and Peyton Manning stink it up - haha) before heading home.
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In school news...well...I missed a test. Yeah, it sucks. It was a take-home test, too. We had 24 hours to do it, and I just slacked off and skipped class and didn't check the Blackboard course website. There goes 20% of my grade, so I can still get a C if I work my really hard. Which, unfortunately, is something I've not been able to accomplish in over five years of college.
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I watched National Treasure last night. I'd skip it unless you're really bored. I had been avoiding it as an Indiana Jones rip-off (which it is), but more to the problem is that it's a Disney movie geared toward younger audiences, which I had not realized at first. I guess it's was a decent watch, but then it was also free to me :D
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Well, now I'm really reaching for material. I'll sign off before I start rambling about the weather and gas prices.
Song Download of the Week The White Stripes - My Doorbell
Another unique song by the Whites. Has a very 70's funk feel to it.
~Toodles
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| Thursday, September 22nd, 2005
Scott's Thirsty - Third Edition
Hey every one. Yeah... as some of you know, I am busy of my ass this semester. So... I have a few pieces of advice. 1. Sleep is good 2. Eating is good 3. Eating good food is better 4. Knowning that .. to finish later
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| Friday, September 23rd, 2005
Funky Fridays - Now on Fridays ... unless Nando collapses when he gets home.
Good evening everyone.
Before I get to today's topic ("Coffee: Destroyer of Brain Cells"), I'd like to update everyone on my American Idol/A Current Affair status. It turns out that A Current Affair really was looking for singing people and not running a story about ridiculous looking American Idol rejects as I initially supposed. I am aware of this because yesterday I got a message from someone working with the show, and when I called back today I was told that they wish for me to send in a demo tape and a video of me performing. I don't have these things, but the idea is pretty cool in itself. My plan is to dig around into my dark and shady past and see if I can unearth some footage. Rockstardom may not be eluding me after all. For the record, my plans once I become rich and famous are to forget everyone I ever knew except for people who were mean to me in high school. I plan on using my newfound wealth to make their lives miserable.
Now, on to business. I am currently of the opinion that coffee is probably the most damaging substance one can legally consume. This belief is founded upon my many observations of borderline functional coffee drinkers that plague my work environment. Here, then, is my Litany Against Coffee.
1. Coffee tastes like crap. In all honesty, who was the marketing genius who once thought, "I know! Let's sell a thick, black, bitter beverage with a vile aftertaste that also stains and rots the teeth to people on the basis that it makes them more alert! People will love it!"? That guy needed a raise, and while we're at it, we'll give his modern descendent, the guy who markets Red Bull, the fizzy, bad tasting, urine-colored drink with the vile aftertate, a massive raise too. There are a whole lot of dependent clauses in that sentence. They make it a very awkward read, but instead of changing it, I'm going to type about my awkward grammar and sentence structure. Back to the point: Coffee tastes bad. Sure, you can put cream, sugar, or Sweet 'n' Low in it, but then you're just getting a semi-sweet thick black beverage with a vile aftertaste. I tried this the other night at work to do some firsthand research on this topic using a lot of chocolate flavored creamer, and with every drink I thought, "Not bad, but still inferior to hot chocolate in every way."
2. Coffee is messy. At my beloved 1 & 70 Shell, I cringe whenever non-regulars come in for coffee, because it is nearly assured that they will leave a horrible mess all over the counter. I'm not sure I understand why coffee requires making a mess. There are lots of things to add to make it remotely drinkable, to be sure, but shouldn't the giant cup the person is making their coffee be a big enough target to hit? And why are they unable to throw away their 5 creamers and 8 Sweet N Low packets? The hot dog people are able to toss their condiment packets. The regulars, incidentally, also make a mess, but they are wise enough to clean up after themselves.
3. Coffee makes people irritable, even after they begin consuming it. I have a few theories on why this is. It could be that the stuff tastes so bad that it puts people in a bad mood. It could be the annoying hassle of making a mess before they can drink it. It could be that the only reason anyone would drink coffee is because they have to be awake for something through which they would much rather sleep, and thus the extended consciousness irks them. Whatever the reason, it's a rather sharp indictment of coffee culture. Say what you will about habits of the Lotus Eaters, at least they were having a grand old time while partaking in their drug of choice.
I assume the reason I rail against coffee so strongly is that I'm intimidated by things I fail to understand. I understand the appeal of most of the vices in which I do not partake. For example, cigarettes give their uses a chemical rush as well as being a strong form of identity building. A smoker has to pick a certain brand, and each brand carries an image or stereotype with it with which a person wants to associate themselves. The identity forming aspect of cigarettes is so crucial that a tobacco company has a near endless supply of brands to market. RJ Reynolds, for example, distributes Camel, Doral, Winston, Salem, Kool, Pall Mall, Monarch, GPC, Capri, Misty, and Vantage cigarettes in our rinky-dink convenience store alone. Each of these brands carries its own image, and I can generally tell you insults I think of for the people that buy each of them. In addition to brand image, smokers have to buy a lighter, and I can assure everyone that business in the goofy novelty lighter industry is booming. My favorite lighter we have right now is a Rims lighter. It is shaped like a car wheel with a fancy rim on it, and when you light the wick, the rim spins really fast, so you can roll on dubs while you light the cigarette. Pretty dang cool. Along with lighters, there are also novelty ash trays and cigarette cases to further accessorize yourself with. Then there's the oft-examined community that comes with smoking. In any given social situation, the smokers will always team up and bond due to their being exiled to some smoking appropriate area.
As far as I can tell, though, coffee doesn't offer any of these benefits. Coffee drinkers are more shocked than anything else when they meet someone who doesn't share their habit, so there can't be an exclusive community if they assume everyone belongs to that community. Brand identity doesn't exist as much outside of the StarBucks crowd, and I think that identity boils down to "Look at me, I hang out at StarBucks." There aren't nifty little accessories to go with a coffee habit outside of the mug, and the mug is rather heavy and unwieldy to be used effectively as an accessory. And so I'm stumped. If someone wants to shed light on this subject for me, feel free to do so.
Before I sign off for the week, let me make one drink related recommendation: at 1 & 70, we have a hot chocolate machine which dispenses very tasty hot chocolate. However, every time I drink it I always think that it needs one more flavor to complement it. Since my tenure at the store began, I've been obsessed with finding the perfect complement to the hot chocolate. For a while, I mixed it with the English Toffee drink we have to create a sort of hot liquid Heath bar. That tastes good but is unpleasantly thick. I tried the French Vanilla Cappuccino we sell, but the tastes didn't blend so well. Now, however, I am on the verge of a breakthrough. This week we received a stock of individually wrapped chocolate covered cherries to sell for a quarter each, and while eating one, it occurred to me that the answer was right under my nose the whole time. Mixing the hot chocolate with the Cherry Flavor Rage that Coca-Cola supplies for use with their fountain drink machine adds the extra flavor the hot cocoa needed without any extra thickness. It might be a tad too sweet, but the liquid Hot Chocolate Covered Cherry may in fact be the Golden Fleece I've been seeking. I can safely say it kicks coffee's sorry little ass in every category.
Enjoy the weekend.
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| Sunday, September 25th, 2005
Weekends are the only time I get to sleep till 9
Howdy everyone. I apologize for the delay in posting people's stuff up here. Wed-Friday are just so mercilessly harsh on me that usually I get home and then collapse. I'm hoping that if becker can send me his stuff before I go to bed, the thought of posting one thing on thursdays instead of two will be easier to manage. We'll see. I would have posted stuff yesterday but I had a horrible experience with my allergies. My nose was dripping all day.
So, get this. That bloated gasbag of a moron I have for a Spanish supervisor was very unhappy with me because I havent been going to the Wednesday night TA meetings. "Why haven't you been coming to those?" she asked me with masked outrage. "Because I can't" I said. "You can't?" "No... it's on every schedule I've filled out so far." BY this point I think I'd filled out about 5 of them- including one BEFORE I was even offered the position, all of which stated that I had class at 5:00 on Wednesdays. "Well, I don't have your schedule," she said. "How am I supposed to know?" Then what the hell was the point of filling out all five of those damned things!? Bah! I knew that this was someone who wasn't going to listen to reason. "You need to go to those and if you can't send me an email." she continued. Apparently, the voice of reason is as dead in the Spanish Dept of UW as it was at Wabash. I just quieted my rage after she said "it's part of your contract" and began to smile and nod.
"Okay," I told her. "I'll keep you posted from now on" I said. "YOU need to," she said. "Cuz I don't know what you're schedule is like so if you can't come to something I need to know." I really can't stand her. She has this HUGE need to control every single aspect of life. She makes us take attendance for our 101 class. WHY? who cares if no students show up? If they can pass the test without coming to class what's so horrible about that? Isn't it their money anyway? If they want to squander it, isn't it their right? And to make matters even worse, she's the one thatteaches that horrible Sp545 class I have to take on how to teach spanish, and even there she treats us like children. We have to sign an attendance sheet AND she gives us worksheets to do to make sure we're doing the reading. God, I hate her. I really dislike the way she runs class and I hope to God that she doesn't fire me after she observes my class in two weeks. I can just see it now. "You didn't take attendance? YOu actually gave the students instructions in English? You didn't go around checking to see if people actually completed their homework before you went over it?" Hell, no! These people are adults.
I am really unhappy with the way the Spanish Department- maybe even UW as a whole culture- treats its students. Since I have my 545 class in the same room right before I teach my 101 class, she instructed me on tuesday to separate the desks from the normal U shape to ensure no one cheats. Yeah, i didn't do that. Before I distributed the exams I told my class - IN ENGLISH- "now, I don't need to give this huge speech on cheating, do I? Because I've been told that Spanish 101 students are mischevious creatures who will do anything in thier power to undermine the Spanish Department... and the Spanish Department does not wish for you to cheat on this exam." Right before I handed out the tests I said, "don't take advantage of my trust." The fact that nobody got below an 84 just proves that they cheated. Could it be that they actually learned something? Nope. They prolly cheated.
What a sad way to live. Getting back to my story, I went to the computer lab and overheard this one TA- natalie ask this other girl "have you done your oral quizzes yet?" The other girl responded, "no-- do we have to do them this week?" Natalie seemed frustrated. "Yeah, I just looked at the packet and we have to give them to our students starting this week- they don't tell us these things. They make us get together every week for over an hour- and we don't do anything! What's the point? It's a huge waste of time!" I smiled at this. Glad I wasn't making it to these ridiculous reunions if even Natalie thought they were a waste of time.
Here's the thing about Natalie. She's the prized poster child of the Spanish Dept. She does everything that they want her to- when they want her to. If they tell her to be suspicious of students and to be firm with them, she will not hesitate to make one of her students feel stupid for seeking her help when it's not an official office hour of hers. You should have seen it. This dude came up in the morning to get some info from her, and she pretty much bitched him out saying that he should only come to see her during her office hours, but because she was there, she would answer his questions. And it's not like she was doing anything before he arrived- se was sitting on her butt doing absolutely nothing.
Then, she starts going off on how you have to be strict with grading or else students will never learn. "mark it all wrong if they don't have the accent mark" she told another TA who was grading a quiz. "It's the only way they'll learn." And then she went on to say how there's so much grade inflation here. That students just want the A. "In latin america, if you get a B, you're considered a genius. Here, if you give students a B, they say it's not fair." The TA's all start jumping on the bandwagon, and then I do something that is completely unheard of in the Dept - be the voice of reason.
"Well, you also have to look at the environment," I tell her. "THe students are in a system where they can't be happy with a B. So you can't just give them a B and expect them to be happy with it, if the system won't let them be happy with it." Translation: this ain't latin america. You give good students B's and they won't be able to get into law schools because other idiots who earned A's will have a better GPA. I was excited at the prospect of having a heated philosophical discussion on what the point of grades actually was - or one that focussed on how as educators we have a responsibility to hold students to higher standards - or maybe that there were more important things in life than a grade! But no, everyone just shut up. I hate that so much! If you think I'm an idiot for saying something, tell me about it. Don't just shut up and make me feel like a weirdo- am i speaking some sort of gibberish? Bah, I hate the spanish dept.
So, the only reason I bring that up is to let you know that if even Natalie can say that the meetings are pointless, then maybe it's a good thing I can't attend them. THere's another meeting coming up this wed. I guess I should email la profesora to let her know I can't attend. Oh, and when I was talking with her, she was going through what all the meetings were about. The first one was about "How to use Microsoft Word." I felt insulted. The reason they make you learn it is so that you can write a portion of whatever exam you've been signed up to write. "Oh, I've already done my part." I told her. "I was on the Exam #2 committee"
"YOu were?" she said, as though she didn't believe me. She commenced to take out this huge binder and leaf through it. "what part did you do?" she asked. "Vocabulary," returned. What did she think I was lying? She found a sheet and read through it... "Ah, yes. And is that the only exam committee you're assigned to?" "Yes" "Hmm... you're right.... Okay, then." So then if I already know how to use Word, and if I have already even submitted my crap for the exam... why get all pissy? Last week we had to learn how to use a computer program for keeping student grades. She acted like it would be the end of the world that I missed that meeting. I checked out the program from the office on Friday, installed it on my laptop and updated my grades all this morning. Wow. I averted some sort of apacolyptic disaster there.
Before I left her office, she made a comment that was so ridiculous, that it wouldn't impact me until I left. She said, "I have seen your schedule and it's crazy." As if to say "Im afraid of you not doing things when I want you to or else you might not have a chance to do them before it's ALL TOO LATE!" She made a pathetic attempt to sound caring, "how are you doing?" I just deflected that and left. But anyway, it wasn't until later that I realized... wait a minute! If she doesn't have my schedule, and doesn't know what my schedule is like... how does se know it's crazy? Bah! Moron.
It sucks that I don't have any time to get any counseling help. I miss having a place where I could be 100 percent honest. In fact, my schedule is so messed up that i have to skip class just to see my doctor. Sigh. All right, I'm out of here. Till then, take care, all.
Nando- the Cowboy Spanish Instructor... YEe HAW!
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| Monday, September 26th, 2005
Melon Mondays - Week Three
I love metaphors and can come up with them at a ridiculous rate. So I thought to myself, what better place to showcase this one fabulous and/or feeble (not to mention possibly annoying at times) skill than right here on the nandster's website? Besides, ya gotta love the easy alliteration. Also, I'm willing to take requests: Either suggest a situation which needs a metaphor or a person/ place/thing/concept/etc. to use as a metaphor for something else and I bet I can come up with something wise, witty, and enlightening... or not. But I'll try!
"Negative" Emotions as Fire
"During most of its [Yosemite's] career as a national park, its managers thought of fire as a purely destructive force. It may be that the still, calm picture of nature they cherished had no room in it for such force and such abrupt transformation..."
When life is going along in a reasonably mellow, predictable way, we are often resistant to any strong feelings such as anger, sadness, or anxiety that will disrupt our so-called emotional stability. As the park managers saw fire as all bad, we see these kinds of emotions as having no use or benefit.
"... park policy was to suppress all fires. The longer they were suppressed, the more disastrous they became. Every year without fire piled the forest litter thicker, so that if a fire were to come, it would burn hotter and longer and fulfill every dread..."
The more we suppress our feelings, the stronger they become, and the more overwhelmed we feel when they finally erupt. So it is actually healthy to acknowledge and express (in non-destructive ways, of course) our "negative" emotions - like fire, they may feel scary and out of control, but they are natural and can be integrated into our emotional landscape. They can even be very useful...
"In the late 1960s, however, foresters began to wonder why the sequoia trees in the park weren?t regenerating. It turned out that even these serene giants need to be disturbed to renew themselves. Sequoia cones often hang closed on trees until the heat of a fire causes them to fall and burst and release their seeds; and a recent burn creates the rich mineral earth in which they best germinate and establish themselves..."
When we can pay attention to, and learn from, our fiery feelings, we too can grow and transform.
*Quotes taken from Rebecca Solnit?s brilliant book Savage Dreams: A Journey Into the Hidden Wars of the American West (pgs 300-301) |
| Tuesday, September 27th, 2005
WHat in the world could make a brown eyed-boy turn blue?
I'm so fed up with my damned coordinator. As if it wasn't enough that my soul fills wih dread whenever I have to enter her damned class, I always get there late, due to my inability to control the bus schedule, which I think she takes as a sign of disrespect just based on how she talks about grading and treating students. I'm not a friggin undergrad- hell, I wouldn't even treat undergrads the way she does. Anyway, so today, I was in rather good spririts because the bus left me at the stop not as late as it usually does, which meant I was only two minutes early to class. Maybe she wouldn't make a big deal out of my tardiness. I show up, and just take my seat. The attendance sheet comes by (yes, she takes fucking attendance... and not the kind tha counts how often you fuck, but just regular fucking attendance!). I look at the stupid sheet the bloated gasbag has marked me as absent for the last three days because I haven't gotten there early enough to sign the stupid thing! SHe knows ive been there every day... why the fuck would she mark me absent? It's so disheartening to 1) run around from place to place 2) not be able to control the busses 3) get to class ten minutes late and 4) not even get any credit for being in that class, which is soooo damned painful.
I signed my name on the sheet and over the stupid "a"s she had marked next to my name in pure spite. Later I just left my stuff in the class and took a stroll near the lake to cool my head. I calmed down by pretty much lying to myself. "Maybe she just wrote down the A's within the first ten minutes of class. Maybe her real gradebook has the corrections." Suffice it to say, I sent an email.
Hello
I believe I owe you an explanation for my disappearance from your class earlier today. The fact of the matter is that I became rather upset after seeing that I had been marked absent - deliberately so- on your attendance sheets for the last three days. It is very disheartening to move from place to place, not be able to control the bus schedule, and miss ten minutes of class every day - which is not my intention - and on top of that, to not even get credit for making it to class. I truly hope that your gradebook records reflect that I have, in fact, been in class every single day this semester.
I signed my name on the dates I was marked 'absent' for the sake of record-keeping.
Respectfully,
Fernando
Yesterday was such a cooler day. If only because I had five great minutes with Annie... you heard me! Well, in the lounge, she and Misty were talking about how they needed to find this book our Family Therapy prof wanted us to get. "Where is it?" Misty asked. "I think she's got the book," annie responded. It was all over from there. I commenced bastardizing Roxette's song: "She's got the book!" "She's got the book, SHe's got the book. What in the world could make a brown eyed girl turn blue" Annie started cracking up and singing along with the clever new lyrics.
Then, we went to one of the computers and looked up the lyrics. BUt that wasn't enough. Oh no. I hooked up these speakers to the computer and downloaded the song. Within minutes, we were blasting "She's got the look" in the lounge with seven minutes to go before class. Everyone just looked at us and shook their heads in self-righteousness. Annie and I then played ping pong while grooving and jigging to other Roxette classics like "Listen to your heart!" I really like Annie. Shes funny, she's into guy things, and she's from Mini-soda. Too bad she's taken.
And that I like dudes.
All right, gonna jet it out.
Thanks To Melanie for hearing me out during my time of need.
God, I hate spanish departments.
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| Wednesday, September 28th, 2005
Humpin it With Bex - This week
Greetings
Normally I'm not one to believe in psychosomatic conditions, but there is one way in which my mind can influence my body: worrying myself sick. Any moment when my mind isn't being stimulated by reading, watching TV, listening to music, etc, is a moment to worry. Stressing out over work, school, the future, life in general...if I do it long enough my stomach subconsciously tightens and I start to feel sick. But then I fixate on something else and all is right with the world.
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Photo Essay
Contents of a dead man's wallet
See if you can get guess what the following extreme close-ups are. Answers next week.
http://img8.imageshack.us/my.php?image=bsmall8ec.jpg
http://img181.imageshack.us/my.php?image=dsmall9hp.jpg
http://img270.imageshack.us/my.php?image=esmall8sh.jpg
http://img270.imageshack.us/my.php?image=gsmall5po.jpg
http://img270.imageshack.us/my.php?image=hsmall1ec.jpg
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In this week's OMG LIBERAL MEDIA report, Tom Delay was indicted No, that's not me smiling. I just...had to stretch my mouth.
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Song Download of the Week is a weird one this time: System of a Down - Radio/Video |
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Thursday, September 29th, 2005
Scott's Thusty - this edition
Dear Nado, Sorry I did not get to writing something last night. Lost track of time and then passed out in my bed.
My life is becoming more and more crazy. Let see... first off not feeling the best today, my friend Hari came over a few days ago to try and get a job. So he was crashing at my place. He has done this before, except this time he was sick. I am trying to rough it out, but today is also cold... and well forgot to pull out my light coat... so running around all day in shorts and T-shirt are probably going to do me in. I got to talk to Kami last night for a few hours, and then a little bit of homework and went to bed... actually did lots of homework yesterday... that is all I seem to do these days (except on Fridays and Saturdays). Usually spend Friday evening going nuts, or getting heavily buzzed as the last couple of Fridays have been constant with that. Then I wake up usually extra early on Saturday so I can talk more with Kami, and then sleep most the rest of the day. This make my weekend seem really short as most my Saturday is spent in bed and talking so early in the morning with a few hours of sleep is not cool. Maybe this Friday will be different, but I think not... last Friday a friend (Alex, the guy I worked on my glove with) invited me over to his place for an awesome Italian dinner and well it was Alex, me, and a guy named Brett. I bought over some Carrona, Brett brought over some wine, and Alex has some really good wine... well we finished all the wine the Carrona, then I had a few more beers at home while watching some new Final Fantasy movie. Which by the way made no since drunk... so I figure it will make even less since if I watched it sober... which this was confirmed by all the people watching it. I am not sure the whole point of the movie, but some due was trying to find mother... turned into this one dude with a big ass sword, and was making thing difficult for the other due with a big ass sword. The dude with big sword (labled good dude with big ass sword) got shot in the heart, stabbed in the arm and none of the effected him (became more powerful, dbz effect). Even the evil due with the large ass sword was ripped to shreds with a move... the good dude like pulled 8 big ass swords out of no were, surrounded the bad dude with them and then cut him all at once... and the thing I learned out of this movie, is big swords rule!!! Maybe there is some weird relationship between Japanese animators and big swords... are they trying to make up for something... I would not know... bring up lots of questions... like... well can't think of any as I am HUNGRY!!!! FEED ME!!! NOW!!! So I will end this long ass note on CHEEEEEEEEEEEEESE CAKE!!!! ROSTED DUCK!!! MASHED POTATOES!!! CHILLI RENOS!!! STAKE!!! MILK SHAKE WITH A BURGER!!! OKANOMIYAKI!!! Time move very slow when you are hungry ...............................................................................yep................................................................................................... ..........................................veeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.......................................slow
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Friday, September 30th, 2005
Funky Fridays - up and runnin'
Hi all.
It's been one busy week, and I've been really really busy keeping up with school, work, and sleep. The sad fact of the matter is that doing these things seems to have kept interesting material from percolating within my noggin. On top of that, for about the fourth time in my life or so, I'm feeling terse and taciturn instead of my usual verbose self, so there's a good chance this will be shorter and less organized than usual. (Afterthought: Turns out I was only half-right about this.)
"Wait a tic, Andy. Are you actually apologizing for not exposing us to a 4000 word diatribe against something relatively innocuous that irritates you for no good reason whatsoever?"
Yes I am, imagined BBX responder. So here's what I've been thinking about in my spare time lately. All of this spare time occurs at work, where I sit on milk crates for long hours on end waiting for someone to show up and buy 2 packs of Marlboro Lights in a Soft Pack.
First, of all the long, drawn out, unpleasant ways to die, I think freezing to death would be the least unpleasant. Being asphyxiated would require being conscious and unable to breathe, which would be horrifying and unpleasant. Drowning would be similar, only wetter and with the added unpleasantness of feeling water fill up the lungs. Immolation would really sting for a good long time until the nerve endings finally gave up the ghost, in which case you'd probably just burn up and not feel yourself dying, which would be psychologically unsettling, I'd imagine. Crucifixion would be much like asphyxiation, except that the arms would hurt too. But freezing to death wouldn't be so bad, really. When I get really really cold, I get lethargic as my body concentrates most of its energy on maintaining homeostasis, and eventually I just want to stretch out, lay down, and fall asleep because I get so tired. I imagine freezing to death would be most like taking a long nap. Not so bad, really. Up there with getting eaten by the compys in Jurassic Park.
"Jesus H. Christ, Andy. That was probably the most disagreeable paragraph I've ever read. I take back whatever I said about your other diatribes being irritating. Does your job really suck this much that you think about this?"
No, this thought occurred to me while I was huddled shivering in the corner last night attempting to stay warm under three shirts, a light jacket, and a heavy leather jacket. For some odd reason, 1 & 70 Shell feels that it is necessary to keep the air conditioning on full blast at all times, even when the outside temperature is nearing the freezing point.
Second, "Don't Fear the Reaper" is one weirdly awesome song. I could probably dedicate 4000 words to this song alone, but I'll give you the one question that keeps entering my mind: what record producer seriously thought to himself, "Here's a band whose top single appears to be a love song encouraging a double suicide complete with a bizarre, jarring guitar solo in the middle in what appears to be a very awkward 15/8 time, which may be the first time in Western Music History that a 15/8 time has actually been used. This will be a major hit." The fact that SNL did a famous skit about this strange moment in pop music history and didn't even hit on the inherent weirdness of this song really astounds me. And it still manages to be catchy, even through the bizarre middle part. I doubt there are other music theory buffs who read this, but I hereby posit that Don't Fear the Reaper is well past due for some serious analysis in a scholarly music journal.
After this I began to think of other songs with strange antisocial premises, and came up with this list:
The Police - Every Breath You Take. People use this song about an obsessive stalker for their weddings.
And now that I think about it, let's add The Police - Virtually everything else they wrote. Their greatest hits album consists of the aforementioned heartwarmer, as well as a song about a teacher having an affair with a student (Don't Stand So Close to Me), one featuring a guy threatening suicide to guilt trip his ex into not dumping him (Can't Stand Losing You), a love song dedicated to wooing a hooker (Roxanne), a cheery little ditty about a man who only sees misery and suffering everywhere he looks (King of Pain), another one theorizing that there must be some hidden force that makes people able to tolerate their depressing lives enough to continue living (Invisible Sun), an upbeat tune about a man stranded on an island with no one to talk to who in a surprise ending discovers the world is populated completely with lonely isolated people (Message in a Bottle), and a comparatively happy tune about a pathetic loser's unrequited love (Every Little Thing She Does is Magic). What the hell was wrong with those three guys?
I had a lot more, but this realization about how messed up The Police were has thrown me off of my game. If I think of more, I'll add them and replace this. Otherwise it stands as is. The only other one I remember was Uncle Kracker's "Follow Me" and it's extremely disturbing theory that there is absolutely nothing wrong with doing something you can completely get away with ("As long as no one knows then nobody can care"). Moving on.
Not to cause an argument between my fellow BBX contributors, but Becker, handing off to Edgerrin James about 8 million times in a winning effort because the other team is dropping 8 into the secondary isn't so much stinkin' it up as it is committing to the run or taking what the defense gives. Stinking it up looks much more like 5 interceptions by halftime. Just sayin'. Also in the world of sports, I would like to mention that the New England Patriots constantly denounce the sports media community and claim it disrespects them at all times, and the sports media community then attempts to make amends by stressing exactly how awesome and underrated the SuperBowl Champion Patriots are at every juncture. I'll leave it up to the readers to decide if this resembles any situation in reality.
Onward, it's a good week to be a Democrat for once. Tom Delay is indicted, ex-FEMA Chief and disgraced former horse judge Michael Brown made a fool out of himself and the entire administration on Monday, and the Senate Democrats stood firm in their demand that John Roberts actually answer questions about how he'd rule on key issues and didn't just take whatever weasely answer he gave and confirm him as Chief Justice despite his legal career being less long-lived than Nando's webmaster career. Or maybe not. In the immortal words of Meat Loaf, two out of three ain't bad.
Melanie's fire/anger metaphor got me thinking about how I used to let out my anger. I threw pennies at people that were deliberately getting on my nerves. I always felt this was an acceptable outlet, since it didn't actually hurt anyone, but one of my roommates that I had when I lived in a triple during the fall semester of my third year at Wabash whose name rhymes with, um, burn...ando, didn't seem to appreciate this release mechanism. So I stopped, began bottling it up, and before long my only release was insulting my other roommate at every given opportunity, whether he was around or not. I'm not sure this was an improvement. I believe it is probably time for me to resume my penny-throwing ways, and since I have complete control over the "leave a penny, take a penny" tray at work, I will be armed and dangerous at all times. Woe be to the stupid customer who attempts to enter Burger King despite the fact that the door is close, locked, and the lights are out and then asks me if they are open. I might have to upgrade to nickels, now that I think about it.
In more personal news, my car apparently has a coolant leak. I noticed this when the "Low Coolant" light came on for the second time in three days despite the fact that I filled it in that span. My reaction was to mutter "Goddammit" under my breath. Then I realized the extreme stupidity of such an utterance and laughed most of the way home from work. If you're looking forward to seeing my "Low Coolant" idiot light in heaven, I'm afraid it is not going to be there, as I have just petitioned God to keep it out forever.
Finally, what is the crap on the back of a dime supposed to represent? Does anybody actually know?
That's all I've got. Have a good weekend, everyone.
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